Bad Kinect games often fall into one of two categories: (a) promising concepts sullied by poor controls, or (b) intuitive mechanics wasted on me-too mini-games. Somehow, Top Hand Rodeo Tour falls into both traps.
Participating in five main events — including ranch-hand favorites such as bull riding and barrel racing — you can do everything from firing a revolver from the saddle (by pulling your imaginary pistol backward) to wrangling runaway cattle (by swinging an invisible lasso above your head). Thanks to infuriatingly unresponsive controls, though, you won’t do any of these things well. Many of the motions would work okay if they didn’t have to be performed from atop a horse that’s always moving too fast and in the wrong direction. And as if steering the wild steed wasn’t bad enough, the game further frustrates by having the horse’s motions mapped to your left arm for some events and your right for others.
We’d like to hurry, Top Hand, we really would. Help us out with some better controls?In the rare instances that frantic limb-flailing does land your lasso around a calf’s neck, the rewards are minimal and unsatisfying: success in the barely-there campaign only unlocks variations on the same boring events in new venues. Single-event, take-turns co-op and unlockable minigames add some diversity, but they suffer from the same control issues. Meanwhile, Rodeo continuously mocks you with zero-point Achievements and suggestions that you revisit the tutorial for some reschooling.
Always wanted to be a cowboy? There are far better ways to live the dream.
Swapping between left- and right-arm horse maneuvering can make lassoing calves a tricky proposition.PUBLISHER: D3Publisher • DEVELOPER: SFC Rodeo • ESRB: Everyone 10+ • MULTIPLAYER: 4 locally • ACHIEVEMENTS: Crippled by the controls • COST: $40 • RELEASE DATE: November 2, 2012
+ Bull riding is...okay.
– Aggravating controls keep fun at bay; boring events.
– Player-mocking Achievements and messages really don’t make us want to keep playing.
? Why are speckled calves worth more points than brown ones?
