Good looks can get you only so far. Once you open your mouth and start babbling about New Age spirituality mumbo-jumbo - wherein nothing really dies, but instead is reincarnated as some flower-based gel - you tend to sound a bit odd. Kind of like this new Live Arcade game.

With how much exposition Wakfu crams into its first level, you might think you're embarking on some sort of epic journey: A priest's gone missing, aliens invade, and you discover the doe-eyed protagonist and her dragon are siblings "inside each other at the same time." (Huh?) But in reality, gameplay involves little more than a lotta turgid button-mashing layered atop a convoluted narrative and a bland beat-'em-up.

As you progress you'll unlock simple, easily executed special attacks, but directions for using them are bloated with gobbledygook. Rather than "this is a slick Hammer of Dawn-esque attack," you get a confusing "this is the spirit of the goddess cleansing the blahblahblah...." explanation.

Swapping between the protagonists on the fly is nice - Nora teleports, while dragon brother Efrim flies and fires balls of Wakfu - but it isn't enough to break up the simple, samey action. We pined for more varied gameplay sequences, like the chase segment that forced us to teleport ahead of obstacles to avoid a giant monster bearing down on us, but they're too few and far between.

On Xbox Live Arcade

+ Pretty cel-shaded graphics and character designs.

- Ridiculous, inconsequential storyline.

- Monotonous combat.

? So what exactly is Wikfi, anyways? (We're still pretty confused by the whole thing.)

5.0