The 2012 presidential election is going to be a real dogfight, with candidates grasping for an edge wherever they can. There have been rumblings, but it’s been a while since any politician has taken the hard hammer of rhetoric to videogame content. And that's the very reason games could prove a valuable source of vilification amounting to at least a morning’s worth of Google News headlines for a presidential hopeful.

We’re not sure how savvy our potential future president is with the current gaming landscape (see President Obama picking up a copy of Just Dance 3 for Wii, despite passing up its clear superior in Dance Central 2). So on the eve of the South Carolina primaries, we’re going to assume the role of campaign strategist and recommend a recent or upcoming game for each of the 2012 presidential candidates (including the president) to strongly come out in opposition against based on their political leanings, and the angles they could use to get there.

We’re not saying a bold move like this could have saved Rick Perry’s campaign, but we’re also not saying it couldn’t have.

Mitt Romney (Republican)
Political Viewpoint: Anti-pornography
So fierce is Romney’s hatred of the enjoyment the public derives from viewing consensual, financed sexual intercourse between two adults that he reportedly had a strong hand in getting porn banned from all Marriott hotels last year. 

Game to Oppose: Lollipop Chainsaw
The Angle: True, the upcoming high-school zombie slaughter-fest doesn’t advocate porn outright, but it’s certainly sexy enough to qualify as suggestive at least, hyper-exploitative at best. Just taking control of the main ponytailed character, Juliet, dressed in an impossibly tiny mini-skirt and midriff-baring cheerleader outfit could lead your mind to wandering about the possibilities of shacking up with the game for the night in any hotel chain besides Marriott.

Rick Santorum (Republican)
Political Viewpoint: Anti-Same Sex Marriage
At least for now, just about all of the current presidential candidates seem against same sex marriage. And so it's almost a given, like saying every basketball player in the NBA can dunk. But some base the bulk of their campaign around it. So I guess you could say Santorum is the Blake Griffin of not wanting to see two adults in love spend the rest of their lives together in an official committed relationship recognized by law. 

Game to Oppose: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
The Angle: Given the carry-over popularity of Skyrim, you could imagine that right now, all across the world, the RPG is letting players wed others of the same sex, even in weird, lizardy interspecies unions. The damage this is doing to the fabric of Xbox Live, let alone humanity, in the minds of Santorum supporters might be immeasurable, with some suffering recurring night terrors of being on the receiving end of their 12-year-old son, Jacob, asking if it’s cool if he registers for marital gifts at GameStop on account of the forthcoming Skyrim non-denominational union with his best friend, Billy, in the quiet village of Riverwood.