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Posted on: May 09, 2008
The Other F-Word
WORDS BY: Dan Amrich
I’m not gay.
Actually, you can think I’m gay if you want to. It doesn’t really matter to me.
Wait – you know what, go ahead and assume I’m gay. Everybody I defeat on Xbox Live says I am, so let’s just run with that.
You’ve heard it; maybe you’ve said it. Sign into a multiplayer match in GTAIV, or pick just about any online shooter. Headshot. Boom. “Faggot.” Yawn, guys. That response neither makes you look clever or particularly masculine. It makes you look like a sheep. A sheep with no testicles, since all you’re really doing is calling attention to your own inadequacies. Hint: Gay people don’t call other people “gay” as an insult. Insecure online gamers call other people “gay” as an insult, hoping to deflect attention from their own lack of skill.
Manly gamers playing manly games should let their in-game performance do the talking.
I still haven’t figured out why gamers are so afraid of The Gay. How would they be related? A rock-hard erection for Lara Croft is not actually required to play Tomb Raider. If you get one, I suggest you enjoy it – quietly, tenderly, with your headset muted. We don’t need to hear graphic proof that you’re straight.
And what’s the expected benefit of this tactic? Will any silent girl gamers in the multiplayer session go “Oh, well, if Goku1982 says that Fragaholic is gay, then I guess Goku1982 is double-extra-straight and therefore the only man on Xbox Live who could ever satisfy me”? That’s what you’re thinking, ladies, right? If so, let’s get together, because I’m not gay!
My guess is it’s supposed to be an slur and a punchline…except it’s not a slur if you’re actually gay (hint: all the gay people already know they’re gay, so no need for the news flash) and it’s not a punchline because it’s not actually funny. And yet somehow calling someone’s sexuality into question became a default zinger at the end of a losing match. Really? That’s the best you can do? Maybe you should just, you know, learn how to play defense.
Gamers didn’t come up with it as a slur, but they sure haven’t done anything to stop it. And they can – those “File Complaint” things include reports for hate speech. Use the tools – zero tolerance. Bigotry isn’t why you paid for a Gold account, is it? If not, fight back. If you’re feeling particularly brave, you can always tackle the problem head-on. Next time someone throws a slur your way, call their bluff – say you’re gay. Own the insult, then ask them why it matters. Tell them you’re reporting them for harassment, too. Even if they don’t get the message, everybody else in your session will see someone doing something proactive in the community.
Grow up, Xbox Live.
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 20:01
Posted by LocoGray
Dan, great article...I agree. Usually though, the nicest thing I get called after winning is "gay" or "fag"...from there, it just goes downhill...quickly. Anyways, I have attempted to ignore this, I have even threatened once or twice to report the offending party which resulted in the ONLY negative feedback I have ever received on my gamer rep. Seems they decided to get me before I could get them. Sigh. What is a gamer to do? Lately for me, it has been to avoid playing anything live, which sucks, because I used to really love it. BTW, I love the mag and the podcast! Keep it up!
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 16:42
Posted by FirelanderX
Mrdirt's argument is the best I've heard in a long time.
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 14:05
Posted by RCD
I think in ten years, "gay" will have totally lost its link to homosexuality and instead refer exclusively to stupidity. It's just the changing nature of the English language. After all, gay originally meant happy and joyous.
I always ignore it -- after all, what do I care what some kid has to say when I BOOM HEADSHOT him? If anything, rile 'em up even more -- it totally distracts them from their game.
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 14:05
Posted by ShenaniganCannon
Hahaha...insults come and go, and this is just the primetime for the offhand homosexual comments. Gotta admit, it's annoying though
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 13:49
Posted by mrdirt
oh yea im 14 so I'm hearing most of this in high school
they only say these stupid kinds of things when they have nothing else to make fun of be cause your skills is of limits because its better than theirs
"F$#@ it all, fu*k this world, F&%#** everything that you stand for, don't belong, don't exist, don't give a SH!$, don't ever judge me"
"lifes so S#!ty, but aint if F^%$ing great!"
-those are what slipknot said, and what i live by
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 13:38
Posted by mrdirt
I don't get who came up with this gay stuff i started hearing it at school a year ago and now (for some stupid reason) about 90% of people say gay instead of stupid. i hear inanimate objects be in called gay all the time; "Aww the xbox/ps3 is gay". I've hear this probably over 100 times. it seems when every you tell some one what system you have thats what you will get as a response. Im not gay, but what do these people have against gays in general any way. As long as a gay person doesn't annoy me, his actions don't seriously affect me, and they not bothering me i don't care in general! I don't think I've ever use gay as a "new stupid" it just doesn't make sense! retard or just stupid or a cus word is more than fine for me.
MATE.FEED.KILL.REPEAT.
(((-(-(-_(-_(-_-)_-)_-)-)-))))
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 13:22
Posted by DMoney3Six
I wish i could get back at people who call me gay, but unfortunatly my voice is more high pitch than any normal 27 year old guy & anything I say will just be made fun of cuz of my voice. Any suggestions?
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 13:13
Posted by PeeKnuckle
Right on, Dan. It's digg time. Everyone must read this.
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 13:04
Posted by ATLien4evr
Your totally right Dan these people need to grow up. I mean come on is that the best insult these people can come up with!If you're going to say it at least come say it to my face!When people say bad things to be on Live I usally stay quiet and don't say anything. But when they take it too far, I retaliate back!Again Dan your totally right that some people need to grow up or I'll make them grow up! BOOM HEAD SHOT!
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 12:56
Posted by ATLien4evr
I've been called gay many times on Xbox Live. Cry!
Fri, 05/09/2008 - 12:54
Posted by FirelanderX
This article is very true. I can't tell you how many times I got called gay on Xbox Live. I also
think that it is an insult to the people their referring to.