The Scoreboard #12

Listen up, Achievement acolytes: The Scoreboard is back again, and if you don’t think you can handle a ferocious onslaught of information — i.e., opinionated reviews of the most recent batch of Xbox 360 Achievements — you’d best turn back now.

For the rest of you, we’ve got a rocking good time ahead of us. A ton of games are coming out this summer, and you’d best clear them off your plate ASAP if you want to max out your Gamerscore before the busier fall season. On the agenda this week, we’ll be taking a scientific dive into the worlds of Aces of the Galaxy and Wolf of the Battlefield: Commando 3 on Xbox Live Arcade, but not before you’re completely informed on Lego Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures, Dragon Ball Z: Burst Limit, and The Bourne Conspiracy. We've even got a reader review of Ninja Gaiden II!

That’s right, folks — you really can become Internet-famous by being a greedy Gamerscore fanatic. Actually, you need to be an Achievement enthusiast, and you’ll have to fire us a thoughtful email, but what’s a little effort for a little spotlight, right?

Anyway, let’s get this baby rollin’!

Lego Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures

Fans of the good doctor’s films should find the Achievements for Lego Indiana Jones charming, as each of them is a cleverly pulled quote from one of the three films in the original trilogy. The wits don’t end there, though, because Lego Indy’s Achievements are mostly loads of fun to unlock. Many are rewards for things we might never have done, and we appreciate the Gamerscore-prize in the end as well as the enjoyable experience that led up to it. We don’t appreciate, however, repetitive bits like having to throw a confused primate a banana 20 times.

Best Achievement: How dare you kiss me! (15 pts.) Use your whip to kiss Marion, Willie and Elsa. — Meow. Nothing like a little Lego lip-locking! This Achievement is not only simple to earn — play the first mission or two of each chapter and lasso your lady with a tap of the B button — but it’s probably one of the most fun ideas we’ve seen in an Achievement. There’s no skill required, and while it’s a bit silly, the points are well worth it.

Worst Achievement: Fortune & glory kid. (100 pts.) Complete the game to 100%. — Consider this an open letter to developers everywhere: your game is probably not as fun as you think it is. Yeah, Gears of War is fantastic, but no one wants to get 10,000 kills online. We at OXM gave the superb Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare a 10/10, but we’d rather jump out of the plane in the epilogue — sans parachute — than rescue the onboard hostage on Veteran difficulty. Same goes for Lego Indiana Jones: as much fun as it is, it’s just not worth it to search for every nook, cranny, crevice, and cubbyhole to find that one last treasure chest. It’s fully do-able, and we expect many people will aim for the 100%-achieved Achievement, but it’s just a bad philosophy to follow, and it’s something that should be phased out of the system. Take zero-point Achievements with it, too.

Easiest Achievement: Hey! You call him Dr. Jones! (20 pts.) Create and name a custom build character. — Once you find the Build-a-Bear-alike station in Barnett College (the hub of the game), pressing a button or two to simply enter and exit the creation mode will unlock this deliciously straightforward Achievement. Realistically, you don't even need to create anything; it just asks that you pretend you’re interested. We’re starting to become big fans of these “Press A, get Gamerscore” Achievements, especially if they’re clocking in at 20 points apiece.

Hardest Achievement: It's not the years honey... (40 pts.) Complete any level without dying, without invincibility. — Four. That’s the maximum number of health points you have with every character, and they’re depleted one heart-shaped unit at a time if you so much as trip over a snake. For those keeping count, that’s only four hits until you explode into a disgusting mess of fragmented plastic blocks, so make sure you’re paying attention to your health all the time if you plan on going 20 minutes without obliterating yourself. Just don’t try to heal yourself too close to a slippery cliff.

Time Investment vs. Payoff: 7 (out of 10) — If you’re looking for a quick fix, Lego Indiana Jones can supply you with what you need, quickly. Unfortunately, after the initial play-through, you’ll probably be wanting more, but you’re going to have to work a little harder for it, exploring and finding secret areas in the process of picking up shiny objects. There are 18 missions, each taking around 15 minutes to complete, so in the course of a hardcore weekend, players who give it their all will walk away fairly satisfied.

Overall: 8 (out of 10) — It’s always a good thing when fun games dish out easy Achievements, and with most of Lego Indy revolving around finishing story missions, you don’t need to spend a bunch of time putting out extraneous effort to gain some impressive Gamerscore. Still, there are some tedious duds in here, so don’t go out of your way to get something that’s only going to frustrate you. It’s really not worth the anguish to go death-free.

123456NEXT